Online Counsellor

Barry Shaeffer, LCSW

professionSocial Worker

experience5 Years of Experience

locationUnited States

websiteVisit Website

About Barry Shaeffer

We all struggle at times with feelings of not being enough

For gay men there is often the added layer of expectations and messages we get from our families, society, and others that can reinforce that message. We do not have to embody those messages. We get to write our own story.

Our past informs who we are, but does not define who we are

We do the best we can given the resources we have. We develop coping strategies, ways of seeing ourselves, and ways of being in the world that work for us at a certain time in our lives, but sometimes we continue to use them when we no longer need them. These things aren’t something that is wrong or bad about us. They are simply ways of thinking or being that need to be updated or replaced.

A wise philosopher once said...
“If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?”

The wisdom in this isn’t to be found in a puppy, romcom kind of love. Loving ourselves in a way that transforms our relationships means relating to ourselves like a cherished and lifelong friend.

We have everything we need to live the lives we desire

You have incredible strength and resilience that have brought you to this moment. What has led you to reading this might be a sense that you want something more or different for yourself. That discomfort usually doesn’t feel great, but it is wisdom and integrity at work and by listening to it you are well on your way to having the life you desire.

We all have something unique and wonderful to add to the world and connecting with that is pure joy

I know this to be true because I live it through this work. My mission is to help you have a clearer perspective on your past, cultivate your sense of worthiness, deepen your understanding of yourself, have healthier relationships, and connect with your purpose.


Anxiety, Relationship Issues, Self Esteem



Age Group Focus


Treatment Approaches

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Coaching, Culturally Sensitive, Humanistic, Interpersonal, Mindfulness-based (MBCT), Solution Focused Brief (SFBT)


Anxiety, Career Counseling, Depression, Introversion, Leadership, Life Coaching, Men’s Issues, Relationship Issues, Self Esteem, Spirituality, Transgender

Contact Barry Shaeffer, LCSW